I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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