yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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