i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
