sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
