I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
