I showed him my bush... on skype.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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