i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
