Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
