I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
