He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
