just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Screwed.edu
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
