He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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