I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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