So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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