what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
