i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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