So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
