I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
