Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
