Fine. I'll sleep in my office
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
