Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
vagina is talking i cant
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize