You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Randomize
