He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Randomize
