Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
