Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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