Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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