I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Randomize
