so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I think your dad took our porno
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
