People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Randomize