Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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