are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
