so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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