She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize