I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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