I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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