It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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