He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Randomize