I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I have post one night stand depression
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
