come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
