Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
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