I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
i've created a new STD.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
A+ Viking dick
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize