I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
