Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
