oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
