how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
