I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
