All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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