Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
