Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
