so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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