I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Randomize